When my therapist asked me once something like this, I got a bit confused. Like what do you mean by ‘What’s so bad about shame?’ I mean is this even a question? Shame is a fucking terrible feeling, people are laughing at you and you are miserable and wish to just disappear from Earth.

But then I realised this is actually a very smart question. Why is it that for me shame is such a terrible thing that I start panicking in situations with even a slight chance of being shamed by others? Why is it that others just do their things and really don’t care what other people think of them? What is the core of these feelings? Could it be something like ‘if I fail then people will like me less’? Or ‘if they laugh at me they will appreciate me less’?

And if so, why is that a problem? Again, time for everyone to go after these questions by themselves.